Make Love Work

What’s the difference between an American woman and a Russian woman when it comes to dating?  The Eastern European woman is better looking, stays in shape after she has children and is less likely to reject you when you say hello.  She might be in your country for her job or to study, but regardless of why she is here her looks will attract attention anytime she goes out.

How is she different from the girls you normally date?    Nice Russian girls want a man who will romance them and are raised with the knight in shining armour ideals.  Try to pick her up like the local trailer trash and you will get shot down very quickly.

It does not matter what their heritage or religion is, all women around the world want to be pursued by their man to some degree.  Russian women just have a loftier ideals when it comes to love.  It is easy to be the charming, witty man she is looking for by being able to hold an interesting conversation when you first meet. But if the prospect of talking to a gorgeous women makes you break out into a cold sweat, then here are a few suggestions.

Remember To Listen

The most crucial tip I can give you here is to remember is that a conversation has two sides.

If you speak without listening, you are lecturing.

If you speak and listen and ignore what is being said back to you, you are arguing.

If you speak and listen with attention to what is being stated, then you are having  a conversation.

The first two are useless when trying to pickup women. 

The point I am trying to get at is a conversation is 2 sided.  In an average day, a woman will talking twice as much as a man so don’t feel compelled to do all of the talking.  If a women shows that she is attracted to you when you say hello (and most women won’t – it is a numbers game), then keep the conversation going with open ended questions.

Ask Questions

What is an open ended question?  It is a question that can not be answered with a yes or no.  Have you ever walked into a store and been asked ‘would you like some help’?  What do you normally say?  Quite of often you just want to browse around first and not feel pressured, so you answer ‘no’.  The salesperson brought the conversation to an end by asking you a closed ended question.

Now what happens if they say “hi, welcome to xxxx … we have some great specials on today, what are you looking for’?  You can still shut down the conversation if you are not interested, but the opportunity for a bargain might mean you give a real answer back. You have not given a confirmed no, so you are one step further down the sales path.  The same rules apply in meeting women.  Ask a question to show interest and keep the conversation flowing.

In the dating scene, this is called playing some verbal tennis.  Each time she answers your question or even asks you a question, answer it and then hit the conversation back to her with another question.  It requires practice to make this feel easy, so put some work into it with a buddy.  Sit down and start a game where you ask a question.  The other person answers the question and then asks a related question.   You have to come up with the answer and new questions quickly – the first person who can’t come up with a new question loses.

Now here is a little interesting bit.  Do you own a company or are you a manager at work?  This is also a great way to promote communication in the office.  Not only can you use it to develop a better workplace, but you can take part in your own team building exercise to improve your dating game.

Tags: meeting women, Picking up Women

This entry was posted on Saturday, August 28th, 2010 at 9:47 am and is filed under make love work. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.