Make Love Work

Helping your children adapt to the changes in family structure will be key when sharing custody.

Divorce is especially difficult when children are unable to understand why their parents don’t live together anymore.  It’s vital to understand that they realize how much they’re loved by each of you and that the divorce isn’t their fault in any way. You and your ex can sit down along with the children and talk about how they feel, and also let them speak to you separately if they desire.

Children are comfortable expressing their feelings,when allowed to ask questions. Recovery from the hurt feelings will be quicker if they are allowed greater opportunity to talk with you. They’ll feel better about having their parents listen to them and acknowledge what they’re going through instead of having to hold their feelings inside or acting out because they don’t know how to handle those feelings.

If after the divorce, you and your ex-spouse wind up hating one another, please do not show your hard feelings in the presence of the children. Remember that children might be confused about their parents disagreements and continue to love them anyway. Making it abundantly clear to your kids that both of you love them and will always be there for them no matter who gets custody will go a long way to reassure them and cope with the divorce.

Make an effort to make sure that their routines are pretty much the same, if possible. If they are used to waking up on Saturday  mornings and traveling to the park with dad, then that routine shouldn’t change if possible. If it was a custom for mom and dad to go to all the soccer games, then you should keep on going and cheer for them. Regardless of the situation concerning you two, your unceasing presence in their activities will help them realize an everyday life is possible and that they are loved by the two of you.  

If you notice any change in the behavior of your kid, seek counseling immediately to help them cope with the divorce. When a marriage ends, it’s not just the couple who require expert help and therapy, but also the children.

To avoid upsetting mommy and daddy, your children may feel more relaxed speaking to an outsider, as a therapist, about their feelings. Children often sense that they can’t confide in anyone and that they must take sides in parental disputes.

An appreciation of their emotional status will be carried out by a professional counselor, subsequent to meeting them individually. Kids and both Mom and Dad often need to get together to aid the children in recovering from divorce.

Children will have a smoother transition after their parents divorce if they are shown love and attention. Either parent can have the custody of the kids as long as the mental and emotional well being of the kids is ensured.

If you’re interested in more information, you can learn more about my experience as an good Austin TX divorce attorney. You can also watch the free video on divorce in Austin TX at AustinDivorceHelp.com. Divorce doesn’t have to be a disaster. Learn how a Austin Texas collaborative lawyer can guide you through the divorce process with dignity.

Tags: divorce, Post Divorce, separation

This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 24th, 2010 at 9:29 pm and is filed under make love work. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.